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First! Lady Gaga’s ARTPOP beats the odds and, in an unprecedented move, sells more on its second week than its first. Nah, we’re kidding. The thing crashed. ARTPOP not only starts week two at No. 8 — it does so with a mere 46,000 units sold according to Billboard. That makes for an 82 percent drop-off which, yes, is the deepest dive of the year. Granted, it’s not far from Kanye West’s 80.3 percent second-week drop for the confrontational Yeezus, and Justin Timberlake’s 80.1 percent for the sorta unwanted sequel The 20/20 Experience (2 of 2). But hey, the Stans should be appeased for the time being since the No. 1 slot (oh yeah, that) has been vacated. Guess who’s back? Back again: Eminem with The Marshall Mathers LP 2, which sold 120K in week three. Expect to hear Slim Shady revel in that victory a decade-plus late, on 2026’s MMLP3.

2 to 9: Fresh blood first. Coming in at No. 2 is Five Finger Death Punch, whose ridiculously titled The Wrong Side of Heaven and the Righteous Side of Hell, Volume 2 matches its predecessor’s slot, though sells much less (77K). Then comes yet another sequel — The Hunger Games: Catching Fire in at No. 5 with 55K. Though the series’ last soundtrack did 175K, so, more like Slowly Smoldering, amirite? Daughtry’s Baptized arrives with a No. 6 christening (55K) and Yo Gotti scores his best week ever with I Am. That SPIN-premiered album nabbed No. 7 (48K). There’s one more noob, but we’ll come back to that. The repeats: Now 48 hangs onto No. 3 (63K) and Duck the Halls: A Robertson Family Christmas floats on at No. 4 (60K), while Kelly Clarkson’s Wrapped in Red gets demoted to No. 9 (44K).

But what about…

Last! Y’all mfers act like we forgot about, um, KTCZ. Okay, so the No. 10 slot belongs to that just-mentioned Minneapolis radio station for its Cities 97 Sampler, Live From Studio C: Vol. 25, which sold 40K physical copies exclusively at Twin Cities-area Targets for $32.97 apiece. How could this be? Well, the long-running series gives 100 percent of proceeds to charity and includes live sessions with folks like fun., Passenger, Phillip Phillips, and Lissie. Plus, the compilation was limited to 40K copies total — sold out! — due to licensing restrictions from the artists’ stingy label overlords.

Overlorde: Yeah, we’re tired of making (ig)noble puns, so we’ll give it to you straight. Lorde’s “Royals” is No. 1 on the Hot 100 for the ninth week in a row. That’s, like, pretty good. Happy Thanksgiving, you animals.

[Spin]